When someone you know is losing weight, please refrain from saying “Don’t get too skinny”.
I laughed the first time, as if “too skinny” even seemed like a possibility from my place on the scale. The second time I didn’t laugh as much but thought “Huh, is that even possible?” and here we are at almost three years and ninety pounds later and it’s just not funny.
It’s not because it goes against being body positive or talking to people about their weight or their bodies in general; because I don’t have a hard stance on that stuff. I myself am an open, filter-less woman who will talk about and discuss almost everything.
It’s just annoying.
You don’t have to say anything.
Nobody talked about my body in fear of it getting too fat, but this too thin thing would apparently be an issue.
Nobody had anything to say when I loaded up my plate at a BBQ or holiday but plenty comment on my smaller portions now; “Is that all you’re eating?” “I hope you’re not starving yourself”
I don’t remember any comments on photos I posted about “blowing up” or “being huge” but I now get them about “disappearing” or “wasting away”
With a BMI of 40, a weight of 278 and blood pressure that far exceeded white coat syndrome at 178/100 nobody said shit. I had a great personality and was fun too be around …nobody ever said “Don’t get too fat”
Guess what? I got too fat.
Too fat to feel comfortable going on job interviews.
Too fat to try kayaking even though my boyfriend asked me to go every summer for five years (hey – we’re going on July!).
Too fat to (confidently) go to group exercise classes; or gyms.
Too fat for a dozen other things I can’t recall at the moment.
I got too fat for me.
I did that, and I am in absolutely no way saying that anyone else is responsible for what I did (or didn’t do) or let happen with my body, at all.
I’m also not saying I don’t appreciate the compliments and positivety thrown my way.
[ I do, so thank you! ]
I’m just saying … let’s maybe not say anything beyond the social niceties of “You look good” or “Hey, you look great” and let that be the gateway for a person to choose (or NOT choose) to continue on a conversation about their weight/weightloss.
I’m sure I’m not the only one who was self-conscious about their previous body, so I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels a little self conscious after comments like “you’re wasting away!” Or “I hope you’re eating!” …it’s like you can’t win no matter what you’re doing!
Rest assured, I’m eating.